So, halfway through sex he stops and starts crying. He said he's worried god hates him for all his bad decisions...think he meant to imply I was one of them...
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
Dude you picked up her Chihuahua and threatened to kill it yelling "it's not cinco de mayo, bitches"
I just called my cat a slut and she responded. Proudest moment ever.
What's the wine called that we really like and we usually drink it with xanax?
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
she left with her roommate. or at least i think she did. but i also just thought i ate candy corn but i'm hal convinced it was candle wax.
There are both cum and chocolate stains on my sheets. Can't decide whether this is a new low or a new high.
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
You said you're gonna end your night with a six pack and awful erotica
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
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