also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
I wish I could tell you that the worst thing that happened last night was how he got thrown out of a stripclub for vomitting on the girl giving him a private lapdance. I wish I could tell you that and not be lying.
So I put about 15 worms in the cuervo bottle. I don't think that's how it works but I feel like hallucinating by 11am
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
well let's see. after you forcefully shoved a half-eaten apple in my mouth, you ruined the pepsi by dumping an entire beer in there.
My Pizza Lunchables won't fit in the fridge because of all your alcohol. One of our addictions has to give.
Our halfway to Halloween party needs to never happen again. There were waaayy too many wasted cartoon characters passed out in my living room this morning...
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
Did you put Dave Matthews band on the playlist? It's really hard to funnel when "Crash Into Me" kicks in.
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
my goal is to never have a bac of 0.0 the whole time while in the state of florida, which means i have to chug a beer before i cross the state line
New life goal: Sex in a parking lot surrounded by a circle of fire.
Hey. I hope you have enough room in your car for me and a Honda civic front bumper.
Randomize
