he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
Just got off the phone with poison control. They're more concerned about our alcohol intake than that the beer bong was last cleaned with pine sol.
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
I broke up with him in the bar & then asked him if he wanted to have a contest to see who gets the most numbers. I say I took that break up well
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
I know it's New Year's Eve but if you're going to have a bunch of chicks playing strip go fish in our apartment I need a heads up.
Randomize
