Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
Just gave my liver a good luck and I'm sorry speech
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
How on earth did you break your wrist?
I went into someone's yard so I could pee and I found a tireswing
I feel like if you're funneling natty lights on a Wednesday at 2:30pm at the apartment complex pool during finals week, you probably don't have your priorities straight.
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
He kept saying I needed to go to the hospital and it just made me want to call him a pussy so I went to bed
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
If not, I can murder my liver twice...it's like a cat, it has 9 lives
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
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