Ugh now I'll have to carry around an overnight bag to all the bars I visit tonight. but hey! maybe I'll meet a dude! And need it!
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
He was really drunk and I dared him to jump the swimming pool on his bike. Sadly he couldn't. Hey did you know a testicle can burst?
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
At 4 am, making my walk of shame, the hotel security followed me to my car with his flashlight shined directly on me. I felt like either a criminal or like I was about to get raped. Can't a girl sneak out of a hotel room without an actual spotlight on her?!?!?!
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
I'm currently trying to figure out a way to fill the bathtub up with mashed potatoes so when he comes over he'll know what's about to hit him..
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
I just watched some kid bang his girlfriend and I was like whatever I'll just sit here and do all your fucking drugs that's fine
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
am drunk, naked, and blow drying cat. need adult supervision
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
Randomize
