I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
i knew i liked her after she chugged tequila, fell down the stairs and said "oh dont worry i knew it'd be faster this way"
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
I just had a Brazilian done for this guy. He's getting first-date sex whether he wants it or not.
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
Passed out mid cig in bed last night. Thank you cough for allowing me legal prescription hydrocodone.
I can get there in 20, one question, Drress Code? Stripper Lite (make up may require an additional 5-10 minutes), Suggestive Professor (professor Kamil's cleavage ain't got nothing on me), Daywear, Dyke (and trust me you ain't seen dyke), or Exactly What I'm Wearing Right Now. (all of the above may arrive under a coat and are subject to my level of sobriety. Which is currently like nonexistent).--xoxo you know you love me, Gossip Girl.
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
This couch is so comfortable I can tell if it's like a waterbed or I pissed myself
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
My professor just paused class to answer a phone call from her dog. Im taking shots before this class from now on.
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