I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
Yes, he does have a boomerang dick. No matter how many times I throw it away, it keeps coming right back and winds up hitting me in the head.
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night
I'm using emojis for drug deals now. It's time to kill me.
I bought a machete, tennis balls, and matches. How is this NOT going to be a great night?
My purse is full of condoms and money.
I like where this is going...
I really hope this is just a phase, because I am not capable of carrying both of our drunken whore asses through life. Too much dead weight....
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
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