Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
For his 21st I'm getting a fancy hotel that way he can at least sleep in a nice bathtub
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
You totally left a blue butt print on our banister
Well I think we can all agree that that's better than then bowl of puke I left last time.
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
I had her number in my wallet, I was sitting on a winning ticket for the blowjob lottery and didn't know
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
You're married and I'm going to make out with a stranger tonight. Isn't that weird? It's like a gap in the time space continium.
But I swear to god if I'm awkwardly there while you try to have sex with someone again I'm getting high with your dad
I'm straight up riding in the back of my truck in a bean bag chair right now. Feet propped up and four loko in hand. Glorious.
I smell like thanksgiving dinner and bad decisions. Its not even thanksgiving yet.
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
Randomize
