but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
Nothing says "I love you" like a full raw dog.
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
I wanna get so drunk next week I throw up on a guy's genitals. I want to be that memorable for someone.
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
I just lit a candle in my room using axe and a lighter, that's how bored I am. Let's get schwasted.
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
Instead of asking him how many women he's slept with I just got straight to the point and asked how many Plan B pills he's purchased
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
For future reference: bathtub full of cheeseburgers = win.
Randomize
