absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
Have u ever been so drunk that pissing urself felt like a better idea than walking to the bathroom? I entered those waters last night
Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
I have a broken liver
I see that the whole "let's take a break from drinking" has worked out really well for us.
An outback commercial just played and I remembered that guy from Australia Imade out with at the Derby. Great Bachelorette Party, btw.
Yup. We're now banned from TWO of our nation's finest zoos.
We'll find out our level of friendship after tonight. You'll be helping me move a body. My body.
I've come to the conclusion all of your awkward and complicated male encounters could easily be intercepted by a man town Yankee candle and a vibrator. Sleep on that tell me your thoughts in the morning. Sweet dreams.
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
Literally just sitting around waiting for someone to come along and fuck my chakras back into alignment
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
Randomize
