Don't you send me to vm
i messed up with two guys last night...one i pranked and left the phone on..the other one i went crazy on trying to be his girlfriend after four jagermeister shots...
singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
I woke up naked in my own vomit. Not even in my bed. No one is happy.
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
Pretty sure I left lotion and my bra in your car. I've secured your fathers belief that your straight. You can thank me later
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
Note to self not a good idea to try and make out with a girl when she's crying over her boyfriend
Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them.
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
whose ass print is on the piano?
Brandon's Recipe: two parts cocoa, one part sugar, one part milk, two parts four, 378 parts paranoia. Thanks for the fucking brownies, bitch.
Randomize