dude, i look like john mccains neck right now
i waited two years for her to sleep with me. it just didnt seem worth it.
she lost her virginity three hours after you dumped her.
are you serious?
can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
don't tell me I don't love her. i once slept with my girlfriends therapist, just to find out if she was cheating on me.
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
Randomize
