problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
Washing vom off hardwood, so much easier than carpet. Thank you adulthood!
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
So the bump is from hitting my head in an elevator. Apparently I dived into a cab head first too.....
We watched Jurassic Park and they made me drink every time they saw or named a dinosaur. Do you know how many dinosaurs live in Jurassic Park? Lots.
Wow my largely unnecessary pool of lizard-related knowledge finally came in handy. Are you proud?
I don't know what to say
When that wave blew your top off I heard someone yell "SPANK BANK"
As a former fat girl, that's probably the best compliment I've ever received ever!
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
We kinda got asked to leave the strip club and on the way out, you fell again. When you finally got up we got a standing ovation from the girls behind the bar and you took a bow. It was awesome.
Was I drunk or did Alex not show up with 100 rainbow Jell-O shots?
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
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