you only like me because i go down faster than a bridge in minnesota
I'm buying this stripper a house, I don't care what her name is.
She wouldn't stop telling me the story of the penis and how she got laid.
I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
i just got a fart via voicenote. blackberry has officially changed history.
I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
you just kept swimming in circles and whenever someone would try and coax you out you would scream "i CANNOT drown, my brother is the supervisor of a water park!!
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
I just told a kid I was in a wheelchair because Santa shot me due to me being on the naughty list. You should have seen this little bastards face
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
A warmed up burrito and jelly beans. The breakfast of champions.
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
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