Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
Apparently, banging my bartender ex-girlfriend = free drinks again. Not every bad decision is a wrong decision.
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
At least I got to make out with you a little before you proposed.
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
My phone just put together a highlight reel of yesterday's dick pic session, set to music and everything
THE FASTEST WAY TO MY HEART IS THROUGH FAMILY SIZED BAGS OF GENERIC BRAND CHEESE BALLS
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
:(. i have vodka in a fire extinguisher. that solves all problems. except fires. it would actually make that worse.
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
Randomize
