What did we do last night that was yellow?
What the hell do I have to do to get some foreplay around here? This sucks.
I think you know the answer.
How can I marinade myself in Vodka?
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
He asked me if I could call his penis destroyer... Uhh SOS.
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
She can't brag about all the anal sex she has and then expect me not to awkwardly stare at her boyfriend when she brings him around
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
I just found a grey hair. On my nipple. Fuck you too, Mother Nature.
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
Cleaned the whole house at 7:30 and after cleaning the bathroom I think I had cocaine on my sweatpants
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
Headphones came off my phone same time as The Weeknd sang "Who's gonna fuck you like me?"...Everyone at work heard it.
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
Randomize
