All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
We were both halfway out the window trying to give each other high fives over the roof while the dude was going 150.
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
This electrician is just ripping my house apart and I'm too hungover to ask questions
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
She unfriended me on Facebook after I responded to her long love note with #demtittesdoe. Jager is the goddamned devil.
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
My stuff that was at your place last night smells like doughnuts. I'm not even mad.
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
There's even glitter on my cock...
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