I mean, you're like my second best best friend we're so close I can't believe you'd do that to me
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
So I feel really bad about last night...can i give you a blow job and we call it even?
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
Yeah I had to push her down the hallway to the hotel room in a luggage carrier. The guy at the desk told me goodluck
Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me
I just got into the cab. It smells like weed and the driver looks like someone who may or may not be really talented at playing the saxophone. He also asked me my thoughts on porn when I told him I'm an actor. I might not make it home.
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
If you have been drunk at one point during the day and are going to bed sober that same day, something is very wrong.
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
Randomize
