You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
first time Ive ever had to stop sex to go pass out in the kitchen floor...
he was in the bathroom singing "will it floooaaat?? will it floooaaat?!" turns out that's a deal breaker for me.
i just found a cheeto on my floor and ate it. i might still be drunk.
But you wanna know what the sadest part is? I had to smoke on the way back home cause my mom would be suspicious if I wasn't high after I was supposedly hanging out with you.
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
We should bet how many people are going to get alcohol poisoning next weekend and whoever wins gets a free Starbucks.
I will forever be haunted by the image of you hurrying to finish your Jimmy Johns sandwich in the Taco Bell drive thru so you could proceed to order $17 dollars worth of shitty Mexican food.
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
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