More tranny stories later!
Whats the glycemic index on semen?
He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
i knew you were okay when you wanted to eat in the ambulance
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
Come to office depot with me I need help picking out a daily planner that will help me keep all of my casual sex dates organized.
I woke up in a toga after going to a Hawaiian party. I don't even know.
The guy who was interviewing me asked if I had coke on my pants. You win this time Las Vegas
You know you turned your life around when your drunk eating salad at 3 am on a Friday night
I'm sad about how hungover I'm gonna feel tomorrow.
He was trying to break into my apartment to get the coke he left last night, didn't engage parking break, so the van started rolling. yup, it's broken.
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
Randomize
