Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
Based on her brazillian stubble I would guess her plan had been to wait one more date before sleeping with me. Seems the plan was flexible.
I should have considered my snorting capabilities before breaking my nose
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
I had to wash my hair with conditioner because my sister got hammered and gave the dog a 3am sprinkler bath with my shampoo.
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
Know what the best part of waking up for work after a drinking vacation is? It's an easy question. Nothing. Nothing is the best part of that.
I'm scrolling through our convo thread and all we talk about is pizza, alcohol & dick with the occasional "I miss you" thrown in.
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
I was told I look like trouble once and that was by a fireman at the sex show. I was carrying two beers and a penis pinata.
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
Randomize