My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
I mean, how many people can say they helped surgically remove something from their body? Other than the guy that got his hand stuck under a rock and cut it off. Doesn't count
Fixing to yell "you're too hot for her" at a Gerard butler look alike. There is absolutely no way this is going to end well...
I don't know where I am and I feel like a hippo shat in my mouth. This sofa is comfy though.
Left and drinking by a bar by myself. Everyone is in pajamas. I'm in a tuxedo. This is my life.
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
The problem with that is that my car has been stolen
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
Drunk man just fell out of said wheelchair
Randomize
