$22.99 left in the bank til payday = 3($7 jack & coke) + 2($0.89 T-Bell taco) + $0.21 in case of emergency.
math is fun
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?
These people keep looking at me like I'm the first person to ever eat ribs in a Home Depot.
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
Hey man sorry, can't talk. I'm already taking risks by ripping the bong on this conference call.
He spent the entire date challenging me to chugging contests.
Either I got the clap, or I masturbated with soap while I was sleeping.
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
Randomize
