Thats something to write home to mom about
Dear Mom, I had sex last nt w a girl that liked to b choked. Im n love. Cant wait for you to meet her
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
in my drunkeness I still was able to plan for the morning. I duck taped my keys, a water bottle full of mimosa and my cell phone to the front door.
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
High gym went like this: I went to Dairy Queen instead.
I started rolling down the window so he pulled into a gas station and i puked all over the side of the car while some dude stared at me. I waved and we drove away
If by date you mean washing Pizza house down with a bottle of wine, then yes I have a date.
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
Being pregnant feels like you have a hangover everyday.. Don't listen to what anyone says about how wonderful it is
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
Was picked up in the middle of a bar full of people...apparently I'm not tall enough to reach for drunken makeouts. I'm proud of myself.
Look, I need your help, not your judgment.
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