this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
Have you asked your drug dealer if he wants to see harry potter with you?
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
I need moral support for this bender
You stood outside his house all night throwing your sister's leftover Easter eggs and singing 'now you're just somebody that I used to blow'
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
He'll only communicate through snapchat with pictures of him holding his cat or his dick. Bit of Russian roulette opening them in public but I did it anyway.
I should get him a card "thanks for letting me use you for your penis on and off as I see fit and for being a nice guy. My boobs and I appreciate your loyalty and dedication"
Apparently he got pepper spray on his dick. So he's a literal fire crotch.
I'm fucking blazing boy. 5hr weed sauce kicked in and my entire face feels like an 8ball of gold bond flying down a mountain of Fresh powder. Just gliding.
Randomize