Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
masturbating while the coffee brews is the new power nap
did you know that if you have sex in the elevator on the way up that people can still get in?
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
Note to self don't give these guys your number. I've seen more dick tonight than a proctologist sees his whole career
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
I don't really feel bad about it, but I legit just squirted in the back of an Uber and it makes me think how many times has this happened before?!?!
Pretty sure by 1p, she had fucked all of my bodily fluids out of me. I'm now trying to replace them with bourbon so 2016 is turning out pretty good.
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
dude. I can hear the air.
Randomize