We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
cutting back on calories before spring break by only taking shots instead of drinking actual drinks.
the diet of an alcoholic...
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
She just tried to snort granola up her nose but its ok she's not bleeding.
So this guy is eyeing me from across the bar. Either the girl I hit on next to him is his girlfriend or he's her gay best friend. I should show him my Penis and find out.
Dude. Do it.
Definitely her date. But she saw it too. So now he used to be her date. Why can't this stuff Happen when I'm sober?
You know you're a whore when you color code your calendar with who you slept with on what day incase you have ANOTHER pregnancy scare
Scratch one off the douchebag bucket list. Just saw a guy in a sesame street tshirt and a tap out hat. Didn't get the memo that big bird's trying to get into mma.
I have the relationship skills of Miley Cyrus and I could've said this was a bad idea
All I've done for this 11 hour car ride is kegel and listen to our sex playlist so your dick better be good and ready
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
what happened last night?!
you took a shot and then laid down on our kitchen table and passed out.. then when we tried to move you to the couch you screamed "no! i love tables"
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
Randomize
