But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
the 3rd commandment: and god said, if you buy a handle.. you must finish it.
She was giving me a handjob while I was wearing a sombrero with a beer in one hand and a hammer in the other.
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
Dude, you disappeared somewhere on the walk back and shortly after we got a call from your cell phone from this guy explaining that him and his roommates woke up to the smell of burning pizza and a naked stranger on their couch.
I pulled out moves I did not even know I possessed, our fucking de-throned gods
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
We got signed out of jail by an Uber driver. I think that qualifies as a great first night of college
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
I wanted to say "you're a souless cunt" but in a nice way. So I added a smiley face.
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