My text messages all automatically add Zs on them cause of your skank ass messages you send me
Dude, she's so old there's a chalk outline where her reproductive organs used to be.
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
After we fucked, her eye wouldn't stopped twitching and she could only move her hand, which she used to put her number in my phone
it was either that or behind a dumpster, and i am way too pretty to pee behind a dumpster
I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
I told her that I was going up to my room to lay in front of a fan without pants on, watching Avengers and she still wanted to get with me. I have to marry her.
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
Texas State Troopers call you ma'am even when they arrest you for public nudity and after you've puked on their cruiser. Country boys raised right.
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
I never thought in a million years that I would have a threesome with my boss and his wife and yet here we are.
I enjoy the company of your penis
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
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