He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
The make-up sex just reminded me why we broke up in the first place.
i just noticed 4 flies in my red wine. i drank them.
I just saw a Kleenex commercial and thought about last night. I'm sorry about your hair.
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
Sorry I didn't text you for coffee this morning...bad life decision Saturday sorta rolled into Monday...
You know its good night when theres makeup smears on the toilet seat
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
It's almost sad. It's like the Harambe of vagina stories really.
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
Randomize
