I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
i'll never see her again. i cant remember her last name. this is like cinderella except prince charming drank too much jameson and couldnt save a phone number properly
The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
They should just send me home - I'm literally doing nothing but watching porn and listening to pandora.
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
Bitch are you kidding? 2016 is gonna be the year our pussies run for president
MY HISTORY TEACHER IS FUCKING MY MOTHER. I am downstairs and i can hear the squeak of the bedsprings please I swear to god pick me up THIS INSTANT.
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
You can’t judge a dick by its balls.
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize
