Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
I would have been "that girl" at the party last night if it wasn't for that girl who puked in the potted plant...
She never called back. Financed a fleshlight.
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
Is it weird to say that getting an std with you was kinda romantic?
I wish there was an emoji to express our Eskimo Brothership
Oh boy. Send him a care package with laxative cookies and alcohol. So he can shit himself while he's passed out drunk.
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
Did we kick in my basement door last night?
Yes. I think you actually bought tennis shoes specifically for that application.
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