I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
I can't believe you made out with me with a french fry in your mouth.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
I drunken agreed to go wedding dress shopping with a stranger at the bar yesterday. She sent me an email asking what days I am free.
the number of desperate girls at the gym right now is unfair. it would be cruel not to let one blow me.
I sat down next to him and my bra just unhooked itself
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
I'm drinking and making muffins and I believe this is why God put us on earth.
This is ridiculous. I’m in fucking college getting high off a potato.
man my uterus needs to drop the egg or GTFO, BUUUSHIT
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
Why did I wake up naked with a leg cramp and and extra $550 in my wallet?
She thought I was dancing but I just couldn't catch my balance for 11 blocks.
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