you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
i was focused on more important things... like standing, and not spilling my beer
i woke up surrounded by junior mints. not to mention, there was a huge pyramid of natty cans baracading the door shut. this is why i can't drink alone.
All I I know is that there's 2 new contacts in my phone. Drunk Backdoor and Gayass Handshake. Thanks, Jameson.
My halloween constume SCREAMS "Hey i just got done with a shitty relationship and I'm DTF"
uh, 3 redbulls and 400mg of caffeine pills and i still feel like life is in slowmotion..lets not take tranquilizers again.
I don't think we had sex because when I woke up he was still wearing the chicken suit.
he's gonorrhea incarnate
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
Just got thrown out of the club for making condom water balloons. I'm not ashamed.
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
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