ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
Is a Chipotle burrito an acceptable "sorry I ran over your cat" gift?
was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
Through drunken recall, I have managed to bring back awful memories of losing my virginity. And possibly traumatized my niece trying to get her to "learn from my mistakes".
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
I told him I had AIDS after he bit me. His dad cried. I think I just ruined the little guy's 3rd birthday, but he had in coming.
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
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