Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
Stephanie. Problem. I think if I had met Murphy before Ben I would have fucked him instead.
Don't worry about your Murphy feelings. I may have fucked him no matter what.
I wish I had my own personal Asian lady that lived under my bed so that she could wax my eyebrows and give me a pedicure whenever I wanted.
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
He lit his shirt on fire at the bar by putting a lit cigarette in the pocket to "save for later."
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
weed salsa. i deserve a nobel prize
Don't know how I even got in. I pulled my id out and threw it at the bouncer, and he just picked it up, checked it, and let me in.
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
Randomize
