Ur dog is a babe magnet. Reminds me of me
I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
I'm at his house. He has VELCRO shoes. I'm too desperate to leave...I may need help in thee life dept
there was already a condom in her . . and it was bigger than me
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
Being drunk is way better. Seriously, I just licked your brother to make sure my spit was actually real.
No he's great. He's trying to do "sexy stuff" for me now, which is pretty hilarious. He stirred my daiquiri with his penis last night. He also tied a bouquet of flowers around it.
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
The kitchen also doubles as a screaming room after midnight as long as you have something to muffle the sound
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
I'm about to do something based solely on the fact that a fortune cookie told me to. This may not end well.
I asked him if we could have sex sometime and he sent me a three page long text about his feelings for me. that's the only possible situation I've ever run into where a "k" response would have been more appropriate.
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