Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
I drunk madeout with my mom last night. it's guna be an awkward breakfast.
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
i'm not entirely sure that 'not getting kicked out of the bar until it got dark' really classifies as 'doing better'
Yeah. Rock bottom was him passing out and saying "are you putting a condom on me?" and me covering his mouth and saying shhhhh
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
Shit ive learned: when going out to a party, always wear a bathing suit underneath just in case theres a pool with a roof next to it
This tiny Canadian guy just tipped me $20, a piece of gum, and a joint. I wasn't working. He literally tipped me for talking to him.
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
Her hotness level dropped from an 8 to a 2 as soon as I walked into her place. It REEKED of cat piss and there was no litter box and NO CATS.
I'm sitting alone in a bar pretending to watch football because I don't know where the liquor store is around here and I'll be god damned I'm going to be sober on my day off.
I hear jingle bells and I can't tell if it's bc I'm feeling festive or just REALLY high
Randomize
