I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
sometimes you just have to masturbate at your friend's house.
I just woke up in a puddle of boob sweat. Definitely time to consider a reduction.
it's so much work when my dad takes my car to get fixed, i had to take out the bottles, condoms, and my pipe
okay, I promise to stop paying strippers to hit you
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
I just caught myself watching and Irish step dance documentary in my underwear drinking nyquil through a straw at 2 in the afternoon. today's off to a good start.
You know it's been a successful day when the only reason you put on a bra was to take off your shirt
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
I think drunk me is trying to kill me.
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
Randomize
