I must be too annoying 4 u.
Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
Just disregard the tooth in the plastic bag in the fridge.
He rode my dog to the bathroom and wouldn't stop laughing once he got in. It was scary.
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
I will not be a drunk bitch. I will not be a drunk bitch. Chanting this until it's second nature.
Drinking in moderation can be fun. Drinking in moderation can be fun. Chanting this until it becomes true.
My masturbation fantasy just had a wedding theme. I need new hobbies.
It took me fifteen minutes to go from puking on my doorstep infront of my old lady neighbor to legit presentable person able to care for children. Bronzing powder and I deserve an award.
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
This isn't a because its valentines day booty call, it's a because your cock is phenomenal booty call that happens to be on valentines day..
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
you got drunk, told him he looked like shaggy and said 'I wouldn't show you my mystery machine for all the scooby snacks in the world'
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
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