A little boy walked by his parents room one night, looked through the keyhole, and said "and that bitch tells me to stop sucking my thumb!"
Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
Just text the random number in my iphone notes that was entered at 1am. Should be interesting.
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
I'm saying "I told you so" now so that I don't slow down to say it on the way to grab the fire extinguisher
I haven't been single on my birthday for 7 years. If you don't get me laid tonight, your best friend/wing woman status will be revoked.
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
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