I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
Reason #437 to hate Louisiana: Just went to the public bathroom at work. It was so humid the toilet seat was damp and sticky. Either it's the humidity or I sat in somebody's yesterday piss. I choose to believe the humidity.
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
I just found like 5 packs of sparklers. If someone doesn't get set on fire tonight I am retiring from party hosting.
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
My contribution to the dinner party was a bottle of vodka and a bag of uncooked potatoes. I felt like a Russian serf.
I standby a snuggie being perfectly acceptable attire for drunkenly walking your dog at 5am. Our new neighbors did not seem to agree.
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
I think I just danced on the bar. With a man named Alabama.
Thank you for turning 21. I'm going to love reading your texts.
You know it was a weird week when you have a mystery bruise and youre unsure if it was from crazy sex or getting bit by a duck. Life.
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
When the dude you brought home from the bar on Thanksgiving leaves before you wake up ... #thankful
The people around me on the bus dont know im wearing glowsticks under my clothes. I feel like a super hero.
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