well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
Some drunk couple just made out on the sidewalk and it reminded me some sweet moments we have shared...
you were wandering around the street for like an hour singing "nothing but socks on"..an original you wrote after the 12th shot i believe
He just made me apologize because his morning wood is NOT a laughing matter.
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
Sorry. My phone died in the middle of you explaining why we would never work as a couple. Whatever you were gonna say, I probably agree.
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
The night is not complete until I am drnk and speaking to inanimate objects
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
He pulled out a Plan B pill and handed it to me as I left like it was a party favor. God Bless America.
Randomize
