when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
FYI I just found your friend. Asleep. In. My. Kayak. In. Pool.
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
Dude. I'm busy doing PR for America. FOR AMERICA. Europeans think we can't handle liquor.
There are panties and mini bottles of Fireball in my purse. Except for the broken toe incident, I'd say last night was probably a success.
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
Was reaching for my vibrator this morning out of my nightstand and strained my neck muscle. I'm getting so old.
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
I haven't lost it. I know I'm not a prophet. It was a joke.
After the edible you claimed you were talking to my cat. We're in our 30s now, what was once cute is now a liability.
Randomize
