honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
We were all singing so you said you were going to play a percussion instrument... the crackers.
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
He wore my sunglasses on his honeymoon..... so there's that.
After a certain point, you just want to make it work. Prove to yourself that you're smarter than the vibrator.
Leave the bottle at home cause either way I'm not taking another shot. You have no idea how long it took me to compose this text free of grammatical error.
Gold star for you, but I'm on my way and the soco is buckled in next to me. This is happening.
6 tequila shots, 3 kamikazes and 1 rumplemintz.. The next day I puked in my office trash can while doing payroll. I may have to dock my own pay for lack of class.
i know i saw many looks of jealousy when i walked solo into subway carrying a cheesy gordida crunch after taco bell closing hours
I'm sure for most of the people, it was the one and only miracle they will see
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
Someone the age of your son tried to go home with me from the bar last night
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
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