Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
And all I wanted you to do is stand there and sing who let the dogs out.
Only I can have a panic attack in the back seat of a cop car and have them move me to the front seat.
Do Not. I repeat. DO NOT DRINK WHISKEY TO COPE. You will end up in jail. LEARN FROM THE PRO
My mom ate salad out of the vodka bowl
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
She just took a mirror selfie at the hospital while in labor.
I'm about to take my 7th shot and I have to to go to dinner with my grandma in an half hour. What is my life.
Listen I took a family sized bottle of merlot to the face last night and there's an svu marathon on. Give me some time please.
I don't know how that blunt survived being in your pocket all night but you pulled it out at 4 am in 7/11 and tried to fire it up. Zero fucks given
We are all done wearing pants today
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
Randomize
