As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa...
She stared for a good 10 seconds before calling my dick "awe-inspiring", and then proceded to give me blueballs. All in all the ego boost made my night break even
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
Breakfast of champions
Is that a dick crepe?
It is indeed
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
Not sure what time I'll be home. I'm currently topless and the damn stripper won't give me my clothes back
How does fucking Canada get Justin Good Guy Take Me Now, Just Fuck Me In The House of Commons Trudeau, and our new President looks like he bathes in cheetoh dust and sin?
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
On a brief change if topic, last night I dreamt I got shit faced with bill Nye the science guy and we went bar to bar and explained the science of alcohol to everyone who'd give us free drinks. We wore bow ties
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
Randomize
