it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
he stopped making out with me and said "can I make you grilled cheese? I feel like I owe YOU something"
Was just told that I was slipped 2 hits of acid in my in flight drink before takeoff. 8 hours to Germany wish me luck
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
I woke up with a piece of pizza duct taped too my hand and a paragraph written on my chest. Good night is say
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
Last time I "ran into him" I ended up with the clap and had to explain why the ladder was missing from the garage.
Nothing is more confusing than dreaming about being chased by jets, then waking up with an erection.
Randomize
