We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
Drunk. Just jacked off for the third time in an hour. I love not being Catholic anymore.
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
I just dumped out my gym water bottle and filled it with white wine. This is the end.
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
I talk a lot when I drink rum. he was going down on me and i was telling him how i wished i could tap dance. oh god
In two separate occurrences, I could have avoided getting my heart broken, and chlamydia, all with a left swipe.
It's like an adderall Houdini. Right when you think you have a deal he disappears
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
I've been drunk texting you for weeks, and you watched me puke outside your house... I say it's time we meet in person.
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
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