If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
He threw a goldfish cracker into my toilet and then proceeded to laugh for 32 minutes. I timed it.
tell me how i ended up in the movie theater alone with a bottle of smirnoff and a bendy straw.
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
truck drivers should not leave their trucks unlocked with cigarettes inside when we're drunk and walking around.
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
You should be glad you didn't come with last night. I watched pirate porn for the first time in my life as the 9th wheel.
I apparently used the line "I'm a bouncer too so i would know if I were too drunk" then they asked me to leave.
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
What part of I just want to watch porn, eat Taco Bell, and masturbate did you not understand?
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
I just woke up naked in a bed with your brother. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO NOT LETTING EACH OTHER DO STUPID THINGS?
You fucked my brother?!
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